February 14, 2007

The Position of my Condition

Yes, yes, I know, I haven't posted in ages. Everyone keeps asking me what I'm up to these days, and when I'm going to have another book out, and why am I so glum chum, and isn't that enough beer for one morning, and how long can you hold your horse stance for these days, and when will you release me from the prison cell that is your heart, and so on and so forth.

So here's where I'm at, past, present, and future.

The Past: Lick Your Neighbor is done. Its been done for a couple months, however I still don't have a publication date for it. If this pisses you off so much that you want to punch Snuggles the fabric softener bear in his fat head until his skull caves in (and it should) please write your local congressman and tell them to put pressure on all the publishing houses of the world to get on with it and get this book in print. The book is an alternate history dark fantasy romp with mutant ninjas, Mayflower pilgrims, turkey recipes, Native Americans, and a woodland creature minstrel band. This may all sound incredibly stupid, but I think it's the best thing I've ever done with a laptop.

Foop! continues to do really well, so thank you so much to everyone who's been doing the word of mouth thing and passing it along to friends and family. I actually saw someone reading it on the subway not too long ago, so I know I've finally made it. Made it where? I have no fucking clue.

The Present: I started work on a new book which I'm envisioning as a trilogy. I can't tell you much about it because my enemies would most certainly use said information to destroy me.

Just so you know what I'm dealing with, and the grave seriousness of the situation, here is photo of just one of my many enemies:





The only thing I can give you is a vague clue as to what the trilogy is about. Here ya go:





The Future: Who the hell cares. All we got is the past and present.

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