January 26, 2006

Top of the Pops!

I just found out that one of the many children's album I recorded back in the late 1990s has gone double platinum in England! The album was a complete flop over here, and a big financial lose for Warner Music. To be honest, the pain of failure after failure was too much for me and I gave up on my whole singing career years ago, vowing to my bandmates that I would never sing again.

"But what if it was a dying child's last wish to hear you sing," asked Sticks McGrizzly, our drummer.

"Well, Sticks," I said, "I would look that dying child in the eye and say 'You may be dying. But the music in me is already dead.'"

But this incredible news from England changes everything! Maybe the children of the world just weren't ready for me back in 1998. Maybe I was just way too ahead of my time. Maybe English children aren't tone deaf like American children are.

It looks like Warner is going to reissue the record over here now, in hopes that it'll catch fire stateside. Here's the album cover so you can keep an eye out for it:

And here's the track listing:

1. You Sing a Song! And I'll Sing a Song! And He'll Sing a Song! And She'll Sing a Song! And We'll All Sing a Song! And Maybe then Mommy Will Stop Crying on the Toilet
2. You're Not Singing Loud Enough (Godammit!)
3. Did You Just Pet My Son?
4. John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt [Featuring Glenn Danzig]
5. When I Think About Hurting Myself I Get Up and Dance
6. Ten Wiggle Worms and One Fat Kid
7. Head, Shoulders, Knees, Toes, and Other Body Parts I Could Do Without
8. Poo Washes Off, Shame Stays On Forever
9. Daddy Please Stop Being A Horsie
10. I Can Put My Clothes On By Myself, Uncle Ned
11. I Can Tinkle All By Myself (The Whoopdie F'ing Doo Song)
12. You Sing a Song! And I'll Song a Song! And He'll Sing a Song! And She'll Sing a Song! And We'll All Sing a Song! And Maybe then Mommy Will Stop Crying on the Toilet [Aphex Twin Remix]

Even though I am fairly content these days as a novelist, this unexpected interest in my old song and dance numbers has got me thinking...did I walk away from children's music too soon? Do I have more to give? Should I get the Bear Essential Band back together again and make another run at the glory that is rock superstardom? If yes, where they hell have my old musical sidekicks gotten to?

Do I sense a Blues Brothersesque road trip in my near future?

Trackback Pings

TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://www.chrisgenoa.com/cgi-bin/mt-tb.cgi/192